your parents love me but you hate me
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize