that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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