We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize