I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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