Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize