it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
