Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Randomize
