I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
