STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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