their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
