Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
