What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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