Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
