i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
