She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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