if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
