sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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