About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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