she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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