so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
cat food counts as protein by the way
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize