need another drink. this is the easiest way
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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