I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
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