I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I don't think brook has ever known best
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
