if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
