Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
