Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
