He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
