it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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