i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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