Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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