what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
