I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
