Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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