so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
