hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Randomize
