just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
You brought string cheese to the strip club
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
