I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
