Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize