Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
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