u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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