How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize
