So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
