I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
