What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
