I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize