Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize