You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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