Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
