Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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