direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
