Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
honey bunches of taint.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
